The Great Debate
by MJFastlane
Summary: Is it a cupcake, or a muffin? Tyson and Max are arguing, and driving everybody else insane. Kai and Tala come up with a plan to stop them. And what about the people who think it's a patty cake? No pairings, just pointless humour. So, read and laugh, or no


Hehe. This is actually an ongoing argument between my friends and I at school. I just had the urge to make it into a fic. Yes, I am weird.

Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade, and I make no money from this piece of writing. I just take the characters and torture them in various ways, as you shall see...

* * *

"It's a cupcake," Tyson said stubbornly. "Cupcake."

"Muffin, Tyson. It's a muffin," Max replied, just as stubbornly.

"I can't believe you two are arguing over a patty cake." Hilary shook her head in disbelief as she was ignored.

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"What are they fighting over this time?" Ray asked quietly, appearing behind the disbelieving brunette.

"See the little patty cakes on the table?"

"Yeah..."

"They're arguing over whether it's called a muffin or a cupcake."

"You're not serious?"

"Unfortunately I am."

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"Shut up!" Tyson and Max looked up, startled at the sudden shout. Hilary and Ray had also turned around to face Kai, the one who had spoken. Most of the other bladers at the gathering were trying ignoring the dispute, including the arguing pair's respective teammates, but apparently it was getting on Kai's nerves.

"Well, what do you call it, Kai?" Tyson asked aggressively.

"Hn?"

"Yeah Kai, is it a cupcake or a muffin?" Max challenged the phoenix blader.

"Like I care."

"Hilary? Ray?" Tyson turned to the two. "What do you guys think?"

"To tell the truth, Tyson, it's only food. I don't really care what it's called as long as I can eat it." Ray tried to keep his tone diplomatically neutral.

"Weak excuse." Tyson dismissed Ray's peaceful offering. "How about you, Hilary?"

"I call it a patty cake, not that it matters. Like Ray said, it's just food."

"Well you guys are useless! I know, let's ask Oliver. He's a chef, he's sure to know!" At Tyson's suggestion, he and Max bounded off to find the slender French boy.

"Hey Oliver!"

"Hmm? Tyson? Max? Can I help you?"

"Yeah, we need your help," Max managed between puffs.

"Well, you've got it. Fire away."

"Okay, we're kinda having an argument over some food. See, there's this thing that I call a cupcake, but Max calls it a muffin. Now, can you tell us which is the right name?"

"Huh?" Oliver looked confused. "Why would you argue over something like that? Well, I've always called them cupcakes, but each to his own..." Oliver stopped talking when he realised they weren't listening.

"See Maxy, I told you it's a cupcake!"

"It's a muffin, Tyson! That doesn't prove anything!"

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"What did they want?" Enrique joined his friend, having been repeatedly turned down by the girls when he tried flirting.

"To know the correct name of the food I call a cupcake."

"Hey?"

"They were arguing about whether it was called a cupcake or a muffin."

"You serious?" Oliver nodded his head, agreeing with Enrique's dubious look. However, he nearly fell over at the blond boy's next words. "I always thought they were called patty cakes!"

* * *

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"Good God, would you two shut up already!" Bryan glared ferociously at Tyson and Max, who, fifteen minutes later, were still arguing over the name of the tasty miniature cake.

"I didn't know you were religious, Bryan," Tyson said seriously.

"Shut up!"

"Gee, wonder what crawled up his butt and died?" Tyson whispered to Max, as they left the angry Russian to argue somewhere else.

"I don't know. But I'm telling you, Tyson, it's called a muffin."

"It's a cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"Cupcake!"

"Muffin!"

"Are you two seriously that sad that you have nothing better to do with your time?" Tala asked mockingly from his position in the corner. "You've been arguing for half an hour and still haven't shut up."

"Well, if Max agrees it's a cupcake, then I'll shut up."

"I'll stop arguing when Tyson realises it's called a muffin."

"Great. So you won't stop until you lose your voices, die, or until you find something else to argue over."

"Why do you care?" Tyson glared at the redhead, who merely shrugged.

"You two are giving me a headache. And a lot of other people, too. It's annoying."

"Well, what do you think it is, Tala?"

"Why would I care?"

"Fine, we'll just keep arguing then." Max grinned cheekily at the Russian.

"If you really want to know, I call them muffins. Not that it matters, because I never eat the damn things." But the two didn't hear the last part, as Max had started taunting Tyson.

"See? I told you it was a muffin!"

"It's a cupcake!"

"Tala said it was a muffin!"

"And Oliver said it was a cupcake!"

"Christ! Don't they ever shut up?" Tala turned to the phoenix leaning against the wall near his corner.

"Not without...intervention."

"What are you thinking, Kai?" Kai whispered something in Tala's ear, making the redhead grin evilly and nod his head. "Good idea."

* * *

"Look guys, we think we know someone who could end the argument for you." Tyson and Max looked at Tala suspiciously.

"Why are you helping us?" The turtle asked suspiciously.

"Because I'm sick of you arguing and I want you to shut up," the wolf replied bluntly.

"What about him?" Tyson looked curiously at Kai, who was leaning on the wall behind Tala.

"Same for him."

"Okay, then where is this person?"

"You'll have to follow me; I think they went outside for a bit."

"Okay." The pair followed Tala, thankfully not questioning him too closely. He was sure he'd begin to laugh uncontrollably if they did. Kai followed behind, silent as always, making sure neither Tyson nor Max got distracted and wandered off along the way.

"So, who is it that's gonna help us?" The dragon was the first to break the silence.

"You'll see." Tyson wasn't happy with this, and kept pestering Tala, but the redhead wouldn't tell Tyson any more, no matter how much he nagged.

"Shut up and follow me and you'll find out," was the most verbose answer Tyson got. Eventually they reached the doors to the outside of the lodge where the teams were staying for a 'bonding trip', as Mr. Dickenson had put it.

"Are you sure there's someone out there?" Max looked at the doors dubiously.

"Positive. I'm sure he said he wanted a bit of fresh air."

"He?"

"Don't worry, Tyson. If you want to find out whether it's a muffin on a cupcake, go on outside. I'm sure he'll help you."

"Thanks Tala!" the pair chorused, flashing grins at the two Russians before dashing outside.

"Ready Kai?"

"Hn." The two left inside moved up to the doors, securing the bolts to keep the doors closed. Tyson and Max were too busy looking for the mystery person Tala had promised to notice what was going on inside the doors.

"Alright, we're done. Think we should wait for them to realise they're locked out?"

"Hn."

"Or not. Let's go back then"

"Hn."

"Verbose as always, Hiwatari."

"Shut up, Ivanov."

* * *

"Tyson?"

"Can't talk Max; looking for help."

"Tyson? TYSON!"

"WHAT?"

"I don't think there's anyone out here."

"But Tala said..."

"I think Tala was lying."

"Fine. Then we'll go back inside." The boys made their way back to the doors. Max pushed one, but it didn't open. He pushed it again with the same result. He then tried pushing the other door, but it too refused to open. Thoroughly perplexed, he turned to Tyson.

"I think we're locked out," Max announced.

"What? No way. Let me try!" Tyson pushed both doors several times, even slamming them with his shoulder at one point, but they still refused to budge.

"Max?"

"Yeah, Tyson?"

"I think we're locked out."

* * *

"You locked them outside?" Hilary's disbelieving screech drew the attention of most people in the room. Tala had visibly recoiled, holding his ears in pain, while Kai barely blinked at the furious brunette.

"Hey, we did everyone a favour," Tala said defensively. "Don't tell me you actually enjoyed that argument?"

"Of course not. But you didn't have to lock them outside."

"We'll let them back in later." _Much, much later, _he added silently.

"You'd better." With one last warning glare, Hilary stalked off.

"You'd think we committed murder the way she was carrying on," Tala muttered, turning to face Kai.

"Hn."

"Jesus Kai, say something besides bloody hn!"

"What is it, a cupcake or a muffin?"

* * *

Well. Is it a muffin, or a cupcake? Or, even maybe a patty cake? I call them muffins, but what do you think?

Please review. It's just a bit of pointless humour at 9:30 on a Monday night, but your opinion is always welcome.


End file.
